Really? Did you think I was blind?

This guy's profile says that he is 34! Really? Those clothes may be 34, but I'm quite sure you are not. Did you think that your matches would be blind or just too stupid to notice? I hope someone reports your 70's portrait and if for some reason you really look like that at 34...God Help You!

Sincerely,

NOT INTO AWESOME GUYS!

CH

UPDATE -- Normal Guy

I know you are probably DYING to know what happened with Normal Guy, and even if you aren’t here it is….Drinks with Normal Guy happened about two weeks ago. There were a few text messages sent back and forth, but I did not get asked on another date after our happy hour, which is okay…except I’m a little sad about missing out on those free candy bars. I’m serious….I have a major sweet tooth, and I think his parents would have been the perfect enablers.

WOW is all I have to say,
NG

The Normal Guy

I think I definitely hit rock-bottom in the online dating world with Ginger Man so I figured the next guy I went out with HAD to be better than the socially awkward, heavy-breathing Ginger. Thanks goodness the next guy was normal….hence the nickname Normal Guy.

We met for drinks after work one day. He looked mostly like I thought he would. He was a really nice guy and could carry on a conversation. SIDE NOTE – I think it’s really sad that I had to adjust my “standards” to include someone that can carry on a conversation….you would think that most people would just be able to do that….not so much I’m learning. Ok, back the Normal Guy, he was short for a guy but still taller than me with heels on….so that’s good. He has a job and a car and a place to live and a really cute dog….also good. He was not missing any of his teeth…still good. The strangest thing about him was that he talked about finding a girlfriend and getting married in the near future….extensively. But compared to some of my other online boyfriends, we all know it could have been much worse. One more good thing….his parents apparently sell candy bars to schools for fundraisers so they have A TON of chocolate laying around their house that they just give to people when they come over. I am going to work on getting myself invited to his parent’s house…..whether it’s with or without Normal Guy. Who wouldn’t want FREE CHOCOLATE?!?

Even if I never speak to this guy again, at least he gives me hope that there are nice, normal dudes my age that are still single.


WOW is all I have to say…but I mean it a nice way this time
NG

My Date with a Ginger

Honestly, I don’t really have anything nice to say about this guy except that he paid…so keep that tiny piece of positivity (I learned that word from the pot-head) in mind while reading this. Here's the semi-short version….

I knew this was going to end badly before I ever met this red-headed hunk of a man. I had an extremely awkward phone conversation with this one the day before our “date.” To sum it up….the Ginger Man did not want to do anything I suggested but had no ideas of his own, which was frustrating to me because I’m a planner. He decided we should go to the movies – very original.

On the day of the date….the Ginger’s 15 minutes late. Whe he finally decides to grace me with his ginger presence, he's A LOT heavier in person than in ANY of his pictures (we’re talking the difference between a little chubby and overweight, people) and extremely socially awkward. Oh, and he’s one of those really sweaty, heavy-breathing overweight men. We watched a movie . Afterwards, I made it to my car as quickly as I could (without actually sprinting) so I could put an end to one of the most uncomfortable situations I’ve ever been in.

BUT REMEMBER….HE PAID!

Thanks for the movie Ginger Man. I hope you find a nice girl one day who enjoys watching cartoon movies as much as you do.


WOW is all I have to say!
NG

Is it 4:20?

Okay…so it’s been a while since I’ve posted. Apparently, I actually have to work at work and don’t have time for personal “business.” Lame, I know.

A few weeks ago I had my first date with an online boyfriend. It went well. Then I had a second date. It did not go so well. I’m 90% sure the dude was high…as in smoked marijuana before our date. Here are the clues:

Blood-shot eyes
Asked me the same question THREE times in a FIVE minute time span
Had trouble grasping simple concepts
Extreme thirst…in fact, he used the word “parched” about TEN times in the TEN minutes it took the waitress to bring our waters

At least he didn’t smell like he had been hitting the ganga, which is why I’m only 90% sure that he was high. I’m also 100% sure I dated a guy just like him right after I graduated from college. Several years later, still not a fan of the pot-head for dating purposes.

In his defense…he teaches junior high math...that’s enough to make me wish it was 4:20 too!!

WOW is all I have to say,
NG

And No....

So this is the only photo posted on this guy's profile. Maybe instead of taking a "quick snapshot", he should have taken some time to put on a shirt and remove his gold chain. The fact that this guy wears a gold chain to the pool is enough to make me wonder where he is from and which one of his friends convinced him that looked good. I wish I could show you his eyes. He has those heavy eyelids and dark brown eyes. Kind of a Ben Stein meets the hot dog stand guy from New Jersey. I just wish someone would have taken him aside and told him that if you are only going to post one photo of yourself, try to portray yourself in the best light. Try smiling. Don't look like you're bored, posing in front of your regrigerator. Were you upset because you looked inside and realized that you were out of bologna?

Sincerely,

NOT INTO AWESOME GUYS!

CH